I Need To Do What I Need To Do

It seems like I have the lived the majority of my life worried about the needs of others and putting others first. I have come to the point and time in my life that I need to do whatever it is necessary to make myself happy. This Saturday is my 48th birthday and I hope I have the opportunity to go celebrate with my friends in whatever manner I choose to do so whether it be massage parlors, strip clubs, Hooter's, Bikini's, or Twin Peeks or even all of the above. I was watching NCIS last night and one of the lines delivered near the end of the show was "everyone deserves to be happy." Even me. When you have major decisions to make in your life it seems like everyone has advice to give to you. I don't mind the advice and I do appreciate it, but I have to weed out the advice that is self-serving and that which is helpful and has my best interests in mind. I need to have my best interests in mind. The women that have become attached to me whether it be friendship or otherwise, have all chipped in. It seems that all of my female friends want me to stick around because they always know I am there for them if they need me. I enjoy helping people but I am at the point now to where I cannot sacrifice what i want to do for the sake of friendships. If I do become involved in a realtionship, and it is meant to be, we will figure something out. Long distance relationships are hard.