Farting And Other Rude Noises

Since I just recently had surgery, I received a rare pass from my girlfriend on something that men rarely receive, and that was the pass on farting. I was "allowed" to fart when and where I needed to for as long and loud as I needed to for about a week after my surgery. Alas that week long moratorium is now over and it is back to blaming the poor sap that is either nearest me or the neighbor's cat, dog, or garbage (whichever I happen to see first). I took full advantage of the pass which I don't think my girlfriend minded so much, I believe it was all the theatrics and effort that I put into it. I used the classic leg cock, the astronaut lift off and a few others that I sometimes employ. I never was brave enough to use "pull my finger" although it would have been funny, at least to me. Women can fart whenever they want to because they see that as an "accident." Let a guy fart, and we have officially crossed whatever social line that there is for that sort of thing. I enjoyed my pass, I took full advantage of it, and now I am sad to see it go.