The Mine Field

Here I go entering that mine filed known as dating websites again. I guess taking all of that emotional shrapnel wasn't enough the first time. I just started again yesterday and I have noticed one curiosity that has caught my attention. The women that I am attracted to or that interest me, do not respond to any of my messages. I had several women send me messages yesterday and I even had a phone conversation with one and all of them seemed real nice but I do not think they are going to lead anywhere. Mainly because I believe there is nothing there. No woman is looking for the lead character in Revenge of the Nerds unless I am driving a sports car or have brief cases full of money. All they do is take one look at my picture, mr profile (if they get by my picture), or my job and I will never see or hear from them again. However, if they are "a few extra pounds" (more like a few hundred), or live 200 miles away, then they are all over me. I told someone the other day I was better off when I dated strippers. All they wanted was my money, not to make my heart and soul bleed.

The Yard Dog

Me and the woman I have been dating decided to stop seeing each other last night. That was her choice. She made a lot of them over the course of the past month. All of them bad ones. Long distance relationships are hard. They can be done but they are hard. If you want to act like you are single Monday thru Thursday then don't involve one single person on Friday and Saturday nights and try to hide your "single" life. If you want to be single, be single. If you make that choice to be single, then be up front with the other person about what your choice is. Then that other person can make the choice if they want to be in a "casual" relationship. My lady friend's choice to be single Monday through Thursday cost her what I consider a very valuable resource in her life- me. Some may see that as an egotistical statement but I do not think it is. I know what I am and I know what I am not. What I am is loyal like an old yard dog. An old yard dog lays outside around in the shade or in front of your car just waiting on you to come out of the house so you can do something together. I don't care if it is just a pat on the head or sitting in the shade with him. Whatever you do, do not kick that yard dog or ignore him. That yard dog can only be so loyal for so long before he wises up and realizes he deserves better.

'Til The Sweat Drips From My Balls

You have got to be kidding me! The woman I am dating thinks "I'm sorry" covers up for all of the wrong she has done over the past month. Sometimes that works but not this time. The trolling on the dating website would still be going on if a friend of mine had not tipped me off. I don't know if she is sorry because she got caught or she is truly sorry but it doesn't matter. I told her to put herself in my shoes. The bottom line is that she eroded every bit of trust I had in her and once the trust is gone, it takes quite a bit of time and effort for it to be earned back. Now my apartment complex decides to start screwing with me (and believe me I am trying to keep this at least PG rated). My air conditioning has been acting up for about a week now during the hottest stretch we have had this year. It was supposed to be fixed a week ago; then on Monday, and now they have got three truck loads full of heating and air guys standing outside my window that could not put air in a Jenna Jameson blow up doll. My foot is going in somebody's ass tomorrow as soon as the damn Apartment complex office opens. To top it all off, the Office manager called me today and asked if I would consider moving out a week early. I will sleep on the damn floor before I move out a minute early just to spite their sorry asses. If it gets too hot in here, I am going to go sit in their nice, air conditioned office buck ass naked with the sweat dripping from my balls until they decide to get my air conditioning fixed.

Disappointed

I would be lying to myself and everyone that knows me if I did not say that I was extremely disappointed in the events of last night and this morning. Honesty must not be a requirement in a relationship any more. I discovered with the help of a friend that the woman I had been dating for four months was active on a dating website again. When I confronted her in person and via text, she kept making a reference that her profile was "hidden." It may be hidden but that does not prevent her from contacting other people and people messaging her back. She had gone so far as to update her profile with new pictures including one of me and her that I had been cropped out of. That was the real punch to the balls I have not brought to her attention yet. She then tried to compound the problem by trying to get me to feel sorry for her all day long and I am now beyond disappointed, I am crushed by this turn of events. She got busted by a concerned friend of mine, he alerted me to it, and she somehow managed to make it all about her and tried to spin it to being my fault. Thank you so damn much. That is four months of my life I am not getting back.

Lack Of Communication

In the early 1980's, a rock group Ratt sang a song called "Lack Of Communication." Communication is a key in almost every aspect of life if you want any kind of measure of success at all. At your job, communication is all bullshit because upper management tells you what they want you to hear to make you all happy, motivated employees. As a friend of mine used to say, "they will piss down your back and tell you it is raining." Communication is also the foundation of a solid relationship. A large part of that is the questions that you ask. I asked "Have you heard from the guy you went on the non-date with?" What I should have asked was "Have you exchanged text messages with the guy?" I asked "are you still active on that dating website?" What I should have asked was "Are you still receiving messages from that dating website?" Technically I wasn't lied to, but it is all in how you ask the questions. Lynyrd Skynyrd sanf "Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies."I wasn't lied to but the ground around the truth was stomped all over.

Clueless

What do women want from men? As far as I am concerned, I am clueless. They go out with other guys but it is not a date. I get text messages from women, and I get the third degree. All she needed was a spotlight and a rubber hose, and the scene would have been perfect, right out of a 1940's Cop movie. They search my cell phone but that was because they were feeling "insecure." If they take a shower, they take their cell phone with them. I hope the damn thing is waterproof. Exactly who is hiding what? They send out text messages by the hundreds to "just friends." I get a text message from anybody, it's time to break out the rubber hose and spotlight. I did not know I was dating a "Double Naught Spy" who stalks my Facebook page, my Twitter page, and my cell phone if I foolishly trust her and leave it laying around. Why am I subjecting myself to this? Once again, I am clueless for an answer.

Invasion Of Privacy

When you are in a relationship is there such a thing as invasion of privacy? I have been keeping a journal for the better part of 27 years. When someone other than me reads it, especially without my knowledge, I consider that an invasion of privacy. Most of what I right comes from the deepest part of the inside of my heart and mind. My heart I seem to give away freely but my mind I guard with a ferocity that would rival the fiercest animals on the planet. My cell phone I am not as adamant about but I have a lot of female friends. Two of my best friends in the world are women. My friends and I have secrets that only we share. When those secrets are broken into like a thief breaks into a house, then my privacy has been invaded. I have a right to be angry. I believe there can be a certain amount of privacy within a relationship and that privacy should be respected. If you cannot trust the other partner in the relationship then you do not need to be in the relationship.

Two Half-Truths Do Not Equal A Whole

Honesty seems to be a thing of the past any more. I have found that most people will do or say to get whatever they want and as long as that goal is accomplished then everything is alright. Unfortunately, I have been guilty of it myself more times than I care to remember. I have also been a "victim" of that philosophy too many times to remember as well. I don't know who said "with age comes wisdom" but that is not always the case either. Two half truths do not equal the whole truth and telling the whole truth after the fact does not equal the truth, either. If you know are about to do something it is better to be up front about it and let the chips fall where they may rather than tell the truth after the fact and hope the other person will not get mad about it. I guess the thought process behind that is, it is over and done with, I got to do what I wanted to do, andif the other person gets mad, I can weather that storm as long as I got to do what I wanted to do. If that continuously happens, that relationship will not last long.

Monogamy

I saw an article the other day on one of the internet websites like Yahoo or something that posed the question is being in a monogamous relationship even realistic in today's society? I would like to think so because I live in monogamous relationships. I was never good at sharing as a child and I might even be worse now. I do believe in platonic relationships and my best friends are women and my two best friends are women I used to date. I never even bothered reading the article because the dating world, especially at my age, is hard enough without wondering if the woman I am dating is only dating me. I am not a firm believer in casual relationships but I guess I may need to become a believer.